Serial Commas, Parallel Structure, and the Ghostly And
In previous posts, Serial Commas and Compulsive Behavior and Serial Commas, Parallel Structure, and Zombies for Hire, we learned: use a comma before the conjunction and in a series (list) of three or more grammatically similar words, phrases, or clauses (even though journalists, Brits, and Aussies do not follow this convention). And remember to check the style guidelines of the publishers for whom you write to see which way they want you to use the serial comma.
The classic example using the serial comma before the conjunction:
The American flag is red, white, and blue.
But you know writers. They like to mix it up a bit. Once they master this basic rule of using a comma and conjunction in a series (list), they proceed to make variations on the rule.
One Variation: The Ghostly and.
Eliminating the and in a series in a sentence can be an effective style choice. Let’s go back to the Unnatural Quarter and see what Zombie Private Investigator, Dan Shamble is investigating now. (Kevin J. Anderson, Death Warmed Over, 2012)
List of Nouns and Noun Phrases with the Ghostly and
Note: The parentheses indicate the placement of the ghostly and.
I look pretty good for a dead guy, or so I’ve been told:
well-trimmed dark hair,
striking eyes accentuated by bold eyebrows, ( )
just the right amount of “rugged.”
I like the bustle and little distracting noises around the office:
the ringing phone,
the slam of file-cabinet drawers, ( )
the clacking of a keyboard as Sheyenne’s ghost types up reports.
In the back room of the flat, behind a closed door, I could hear
muffled screams, ( )
the sounds of a struggle.
List of Verb Phrases with the Ghostly and
The ghostly and with a series of verb phrases builds tension in the story.
I spotted the silhouette of a large hairy form
loping among the graves,
sniffing the ground, ( )
Without me in the office Robin threw herself back into her cases,
filing more briefs and appeals,
appearing in court, ( )
speaking with fiery vehemence on behalf of her clients.
List of Independent Clauses (complete sentences in a series) with the ghostly and
Businesses sprang up that catered to the specialized clientele:
Commercial blood drives commissioned fresh supplies for vampire customers;
processing plants developed seasonings and treatments to make chicken “taste just like human”; ( )
restaurants and bars served the proper food choices.
In order to live peacefully together, unnaturals had learned to control their base urges and get along with one another…
Werewolves no longer killed human victims each full moon,
vampires gave up drinking all but voluntarily donated blood, ( )
zombies and ghouls foreswore eating human flesh.
The Fragmented Spirit: The Serial and, the Ghostly and, and the First Word of Sentence and.
Why not throw in another way to use the word and in a sentence (or not)?
Our grammar school teachers frowned when we innocently began sentences with a capitalized And. But writers nowadays regularly use that capitalized And to begin sentences, thumbing their noses at their grade-school teachers, I guess.
In this next example, Kevin J. Anderson throws in three different ways to use the word and:
- the compound sentence and,
- the ghostly and,
- and the first word of sentence And.
I’m dead, for starters—it happens.
But I’m still ambulatory, and I can still think, ( ) still be a contributing member of society (such as it is, these days).
And still solve crimes.
Thank goodness for P. I. Shamble. What would this world be like if all those zombies, vampires, werewolves, ghouls, succubi, and other assorted created had no legal assistance to solve their life’s problems?
Restless unnaturals instead of placated unnaturals? Let’s not go there! Keep up the good word, Shamble. In the meantime, the rest of us may borrow some of your writing stylistics using the conjunction and.
(Note: While zombie books are not especially a favorite of mine, I do believe it is important to read widely across all genres. Sometimes we can learn new things when reading in a genre that is not familiar to us. And, these books are funny!)